July 7, 2005
The home of world comedy spoof entertainment +++ Cell Phone Latest

Cell Phone Technology Latest: Introducing In-Message™ Audio

Enhance your conversations with sound effects....

Ever had a telephone conversation and wanted to slam the phone down in disgust but you couldn't because it was an ickle cell phone and if you did slam it down it would snap into over 2 pieces and even when you did that it would only make the sound of a crunched housefly?

Feel the need to be able to make a loud 'bangy' sound to the person at the other end of the line to show your disgust/anger/frustration but all you have is a cell phone and you are in a 'good' public place where you can't vocalize your emotions?

Your wait is over...

The next generation of cell phones is to offer In-Message™ audio options to provide an added element to your conversations.

Users click a special In-Message™ audio button and can select from a menu of sound effects, including the items below (all files mp3):

Exasperated/Panicked [Click here]

Doh! [Click here]

In a mess [Click here]

Cell phone users have told us that they are prepared to give the following statements for use in advertisements if paid sufficient amounts of money by a cell phone operator:

"At last I can express outrage and anger without the need to shout! It's perfect for when taking calls while reading bedtime stories to the kids, or at funerals."

"I love nothing better than a good long shout down the phone but people on the train are fed up with me. In-Message™ audio provides all of the fun of the professional wrestling ring but without those killer frowns from my fellow commuters."

"I am on my thirteenth cell phone this year. I have a habit of slamming the phone down or squeezing hard when angered. Now I can express all of my frustration with the press of a single In-Message™ button! Perfect!"

"In-Message™ audio provides a seamless bridge from my pent up sexual frustrations and the latest in Hollywood sound effects. Sensational! Splat! Boing!"

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