Star
Wars 3 (/6) Revenge of the Sith is the first PG movie to get a special popcorn
guidance rating in movie theater's, we can reveal*.
The
long awaited prequel sequel is said to be so dark'n'scary in places that
movie go'ers are in danger of showering those around them with popcorn at any
time.
To
avoid the danger of in-cinema popcorn eruption, theater's have been told
to only sell popcorn in special officially licensed Revenge of the Sith
popcorn containers which are fitted with a hinged lid.
BANNED |
|
Classic
open topped popcorn container design banned from Revenge of the Sith cinemas |
The
new official design forces the popcorn eater to push their hand into the unit
to remove the popcorn. As soon as the hand is removed, the hinged lid closes and
thus stops the popcorn from showering over everyone if the popcorn eater were
to suddenly jolt upwards or to the side.
|
Official
popcorn holder
for Revenge of the Sith |
|
The
design, based on a popular kitchen waste disposal idea, has been rushed through
sweat shops in Indonesia in record time for the movie's world-wide release in
May.
A
spokesman told us that this officially licensed container will add
an extra $5 to the cost of in-cinema popcorn, but was a 'small price to pay for
protecting fellow cinema goers from being buried under a mountain of hurled popcorn'.
Our
experts asked the company that made the container what happens if the popcorn
eater is so scared during the movie that they throw the whole plastic container
up into the air? Our experts have calculated that a Revenge of the Sith
plastic container filled with popcorn is at least 57 times heavier than a single
piece of popcorn.
When
the company finally called us back, they assured us that an officially licensed
Revenge of the Sith helmet and knee pads set will be on sale to protect
against the new danger of officially licensed popcorn container dropping on
your head during the scary bits.
Phew.
The marketing cycle seems to be complete to us. Good night.
