Security
chiefs have put world radio stations on alert for a possible joke attack, expected
this Friday.
What
is believed to be one of the World's funniest jokes, originally described in the
now banned Internet Terrorist's Joke Book, has a 5 feet long feather in
the punchline.
The
joke is widely regarded as the most hysterically funny thing ever written, and
renders its victim helpless for at least 20 minutes, enough time to do irreparable
damage to the world economy in lost work and ruptures.
It
is believed that terrorists are planning to phone the joke into local radio talk
shows in prime time, in an attempt to disseminate the joke quickly to an unsuspecting
population.
In
computer simulations, an economy the size of Dallas could be rendered hopeless
in under 25 minutes.
As
a precaution, security experts advise that in-car radios should be switched off
when driving on Friday.
Listeners
in Europe are apparently safe, we have learned, as the joke does not work with
the metric system.
Listeners will know they are about to hear the joke because it starts like this:
Other
forms of this joke are possible.
If
you are unable to switch the radio off in time, and find yourself starting to
laugh, it is important that you isolate yourself, place a damp cloth over your
head (to stop you overheating) and do not pass on the joke in any of its forms.
Police
departments across the globe have been briefed by governments on how to handle
a mass outbreak of hysterical laughter. Emergency supplies of damp cloths have
been flown to all four corners of the globe.
