Marcia,
Washington DC: "It's a bit like baseball except the players don't run
in circles, there are always two batsmen up at any one time, and the players don't
have enormous stomachs."
Boy
James, Marseilles: "A cricket bat is like a flattened baguette made out
of oak."
James,
Wimbledon: "The batting side is in until the other side gets them out,
or it's the end of an innings, or it's cup-of-tea-time. Your team is out when
there is nobody left to come in to bat and the bowling side are not still in the
pavilion drinking tea."
Ichtmar,
Kashmir: "There are two sides, one armed with a bat, the other with a
ball. The one with the ball throws it as hard as he can at the one with the bat,
who tries to
defend himself by hitting the ball as far away as possible."
Horace,
Mexico: "If the bowler manages to hit the bail, which sits on the wicket
behind the batsman, the batsman is out. If there's a LBW (leg before wicket) everyone
on the bowling side must jump up and down with their finger in the air and shout
HOWZAT? to the umpire (who always holds everyone's
jersey round his waist)."
Harry,
Venezuela: "The bowler must make the ball bounce once before it reaches
the batsman. There must be no throwing of the ball directly at the batsman even
if your country has just invaded Kashmir."
Sugar
Bob, Monte Carlo: "Play stops for tea at 3 o'clock in the afternoon.
Batsmen may remove their leg and head shields at this time if they want or can
keep them on. If, however, they spill tea on the cricketing whites they must pay
a forfeit in the showers later."
Bruce,
Sydney: "Sometimes, to get some free publicity, a person from the crowd
will run across the field completely starkers (naked). Batsmen must not try to
hit the balls on the streaker with their bats even if they come close enough."
