Bringing
you the exclusive polls nobody else wanted
USA:
An exclusive poll carried out for this web site shows that 7 out of 10
seniors in swing states who are on at least three kinds of medication, over the
age of 85, and living in homes for the elderly, would choose to buy their hot
dogs, and hot processed meat snacks, from Vice President Dick Cheney.
| |
Hot
'Dick' Dog Cheney | Hot
'John' Dog Edwards |
This
is the first poll following the candidate's performance in the vice presidential
debate earlier this week. No candidate who has lost the hot dog test has ever
gone on to win the election, apart from Dan Quayle.
Who
he? |  |  | Gollum | Cheney |
|
|
|
The
test is important as it shows that people like to feel good about themselves when
buying food which contains questionable ingredients that could make them choke
violently.
Pollsters
also found that Dick Cheney was the preferred choice to lead the elderly in 'song
around the piano'. Senator John Edwards, on the other hand, was the most trusted
person to take seniors out and bring them back alive on walks.
