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News Poll: Dick Cheney Leads In Crucial VP Hot Dog Test with Seniors

Exclusive Poll

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USA: An exclusive poll carried out for this web site shows that 7 out of 10 seniors in swing states who are on at least three kinds of medication, over the age of 85, and living in homes for the elderly, would choose to buy their hot dogs, and hot processed meat snacks, from Vice President Dick Cheney.

Hot 'Dick' Dog Cheney
Hot 'John' Dog Edwards

This is the first poll following the candidate's performance in the vice presidential debate earlier this week. No candidate who has lost the hot dog test has ever gone on to win the election, apart from Dan Quayle.

Who he?
Gollum
Cheney

The test is important as it shows that people like to feel good about themselves when buying food which contains questionable ingredients that could make them choke violently.

Pollsters also found that Dick Cheney was the preferred choice to lead the elderly in 'song around the piano'. Senator John Edwards, on the other hand, was the most trusted person to take seniors out and bring them back alive on walks.

 
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