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'Puppetry of the Penis' is latest Moscow busking craze

NSFW/NSFH - Do not try this anywhere!
Scene of performance

Moscow: A new craze, in which street buskers perform sketches from the controversial stage show Puppetry of the Penis inside subway stations, has been criticised by police, but applauded by art lovers and the public, we have been informed.

The controversial stage show, which originated from Australia, has taken the world by storm.

In the stage show, men pull and squeeze their penises into comical shapes to wide hilarity and screams.

According to our sources, in the last month there have been over 15 public performances inside a Moscow subway station.

The sets each lasted less than 15 minutes and involved 10 of the more complicated tricks.

A busker told us:

"I have tried singing and playing my guitar, but, to be quite honest, there is nothing more profitable than a PofP set."

These are the three most popular penis tricks (with instructions):

1) The Hand Mummy
Pull penis hard to extend to limit of elasticity. Roll clockwise round hand up to five times. Wiggle fingers.
2) The Squirrel Eating Nuts
Pull the penis all the way round the side of the scrotum and repeatedly 'dab' the end on the left and right testicles while telling a story about a squirrel you have met.
3) The Towel 'Snap'
Pull the penis to the limit of its elasticity and then let go. Repeat until a loud snapping sound is heard. Invite a member of the audience to take part (ensure they warm their hands before doing so).

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DON'T TRY THESE TRICKS - THIS IS COMEDY

You only have yourself to blame if you now click here (NSFW)(link to puppetryofthepenis.com)

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