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Fahrenheit 90210: George Bush releases own film

"I'm going on holiday to France", says US voter

'Shocked', 'stunned' and 'frazzled' by the runaway success of Michael Moore's movie, Fahrenheit 911, President Bush's re-election campaign team are rushing out a response into movie theaters across the nation.

The movie, Fahrenheit 90210, is set in a High School in Beverly Hills and tells the tale of a big, fat, lardy French student, Michelle Moore, who picks on good looking American hunks for no reason in particular.

Michelle becomes fixated on 'gorgeous' George Bush but, when her amorous advances are 'politely declined without being nasty in any way', seeks to bring him down along with his All American basketball buddies.

The pre-release press review we were given told us:

    "The character, Michelle, is one of the most obnoxious characters ever to strip for a beach based movie."
    "She swears, drinks heavily, takes drugs, looks at underage porn on the internet. She farts and burps all the while."
    "Michelle starts a brawl in a bar after a bartender refuses to refill the free-bar nuts. In one scene she picks up and throws through the air small children happily playing in a McDonalds playpen. She's just a whole truck-load of trouble and shouldn't be trusted in any way."

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