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Annual Bra Olympics To Go Ahead In Spite of Recalls

300 year Swiss tradition

Organizers of the 2004 Bra Olympics, a 300 year tradition held in the Swiss village of Ulma, say they intend to go ahead with this year's event in spite of a number of bra recalls.

An organizer told us:

"Our plans were thrown into disarray earlier this week because of the recall of the Playtex Deep Plunge Clearly Daring Wonderbra which snapped under pressure; we had been training with this bra which was particularly good for supporting large melons."

The Bra Olympics were invented by a schoolboy in 1702. The boy realized, early on in the development of the modern bra, that they made excellent catapults, sling shots and blindfolds for large animals.

Provisional Timetable 26th December 2004

9:30 Public bra flexing, stretching, be-oilment and other warm-up exercises.

10:00 The Bra Fling (based loosely on the hammer field event). Contestants compete in three categories attempting to hurl their bra loaded with one of the following:

    a) Two 10oz potatoes
    b) Two bowling balls
    c) Two large ripe melons.

The furthest fling for each category from a standing position wins.

11:30 Bra Catapult: In which contestants secure each end of the bra upon a steel frame and ping the bra backwards to catapult items ahead (in the three categories above).

13:00 Bra Handicap Horse Racing. Where the bra is fitted around the horse's eyes, or the rider's eyes, depending on the handicap.

15:00 Bra Gymnastics, including bra free style floor event, and the bra vault.

16:30 Shower room bra whipping and medals ceremonies.

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