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Michael Jackson soap-on-a-ropes sell out world-wide
"When you need to show your support, only buying tacky trinkets will do"

Michael Jackson soap-on-a-ropes have sold out throughout the world leaving well wishers wondering what other tacky trinkets there are left to buy to show their solidarity with the star who is facing yet to be named allegations.

We bought the last Jacko-a-rope from our local store. We made children cry

Manufacturers tell us there is simply no way they have enough time to produce any more merchandise before Christmas, although a man in a coat told us "we are confident of meeting his arraignment day in January".

Michael Jackson merchandise is set to be the Christmas must have gift this year for fans of the star.

Fans warned about cheap unofficial soap-on-a-ropes seen in markets in Tehran and Istanbul. These too have sold out

"I haven't seen so much crap on sale since Elvis died," a concerned bystander told us.

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