The home of world comedy truth entertainment +++ The revolution started one click ago
Domino's to experiment with Gulf proven precision pizza delivery system
Pizza can be there before you put down the phone
(Proposed advertising campaign - first draft - client name withheld for market sensitive reasons)

We are proud to be able to offer our customers the latest in pizza delivery technology - just imagine, our delicious pizza delivered straight to your table... but without any of the inconvenience of having to stand up to go open the door!

The 'Just keep a window open and it's on your table©' range of pizza 'direct to your mouth®' is set to revolutionize pizza delivery enjoyment, using the very latest in precision guidance systems perfected by the US military in Iraq.

So, if you are fed up with having to get up to answer the door when the pizza delivery guy calls (and who isn't?) phone our precision guided pizza delivery service team, specifying exact GPS coordinates and the size of window open, and in pops your pizza all fresh'n'cheesy. Mmmm yummedy mmmh!

All deliveries are subject to the following terms and conditions:

Only available to people with a valid credit card and a current life assurance policy.

Customers must have a standard sized unimpeded window ("the designated delivery window") no smaller than 24ins by 10ins.

Windows with large trees or fencing nearby could cause problems with delivery - if you would like to take advantage of our tree felling option please ask our sales assistant.

Customers with pet dogs must keep them on a lead at all times during the delivery process. Dogs who like playing 'Frisbee' must be hidden in an unlit room.

We may sometimes combine two orders in one delivery if in the same block but if we do this we will ping a 2 liter bottle of cola with your order (do not open this for at least three days).

All orders are delivered at owners risk, you certify that you have sufficient medical and buildings insurance before delivery is attempted.

Our most popular features site wide
This is an archived story, for our latest stories click here
Don't stop searching for the truth. You certainly won't find it here.
"The home of truth entertainment", "The truth is in here" and "Uniting the world through sarcasm"(c) theVoiceofReason.com TM. World rights reserved. This is a comedy site with 100% original material. All stories are made up, nothing is true.
Do you have a comment? Help us improve: editor@theVoiceofReason.com
Advert
theVoiceofReason.com when only cynicism will do