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The
Bush administration was forced to admit last night that it
has authorised the development of a new range of 'nookoola
weapons' for use on the battlefield. They are designed to
destroy Iraqi weapons of mass destruction wherever in the
world they are found.
"This
new weapons program, however, will not be covered by the
Nuclear Test ban treaty as they are not Nuclear weapons
as such, they are Nookoola ones", a Bush spokesman
told us.
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Surprising
Fact
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George
Bush likes to take a nap during meetings with foreign
leaders.
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Commentators,
including some reputable satirical sources, have persistently
joked about Bush's inability to say the word Nuclear, but
now his fiendish plan is becoming clear, with over ten acceptable
pronunciations currently being used in White House papers.
"It
is legally possible for a new nuclear weapons program to
be developed, cloaked under under the guise of an unexpected
spelling" - this according to a Supreme Court Judge
who we are unable to name.
White
House Media Paper entitled Plausible Deniability: "If
questioned by a reporter about nuclear weapons, the president
can honestly say he knows of no US nuclear weapons program,
because to him they are all nookoola ones."
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