| The
Three Tenors have been sounded out to see if they are willing
to work on an album of Opera-ified Onion classics.
The
Onion, which is world renowned for its Area man stories, wants
to release an album wittily entitled 'Aria man sings The Onion',
we have been told.
The
company's marketing people have told reporters that they are
'excited about reworking a number of their headlines for the
Opera market by simply changing the word Area to Aria - a
joke which is both funny and economical as it reuses
our extensive back catalogue of stories'.
The
following headlines have been selected as possible stories
that can be adjusted for the Opera-ification.
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Area
Man Told His Limp Could Be Considered As Performance
Art By Street Bum
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Area
Woman Arraigned For Graffiti Spelling Error, Says She
Will Take a Dictionary With Her Next Time
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Area
Man Sets off Airport Security Alarms After Eating Rocket
Burger
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Overweight
Area Dieting Man Took All Day To Pull On Pair Of Old
Pants, Rewards Himself With Cake
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If
this strategy is successful, the
Onion brand is to be used to rework a CD of classic tracks,
such as:
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Area
Baby light my fire
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Area
girl, you'll be an area woman soon
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I
can't get no satisfaction (in this area)
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